Ten months ago I took my 3 month old daughter to daycare for the first time. I was nervous and unsure if I was making the right parenting decision, one of my first major parenting decisions. The night before I dropped her off, I cried and whaled to my husband that she would not remember me and I wasn’t sure if strangers should be raising my child. It was hard, very hard, but luckily I fell in love with her teachers and so did she.
Fast-forward to last week, when my now 13 month old needed to move up to the next class. I had to remind myself that moving up to the next class will allow her to grow and learn in a structured setting as a toddler. I know that it is the best thing for her, but sometimes the best thing is still hard on everyone. Moving from the infant classroom was a transition that I had not been prepared for.
I knew it would be hard on my daughter, but I didn’t realize how tough it would be for me. It has been tough to watch her walk to her old classroom and not understand why she cannot go in there. It has been tough to stay positive so she will stop crying, when the lump in my throat is rising and I cannot fully breakdown until I am in the car. Alone in my car I cry. It occurs to me that my baby is growing quickly and will now be with new people. Yes, the new teachers are fabulous, but I don’t know them yet and I have to let new people into my little safe bubble. As we walked out on Friday, she saw her old teacher and squealed with excitement as she took off running into her arms. I cried. I am tearing up just thinking about it again. Change is always tough, even if you are just moving across the hall. It is getting easier and by the end of this week, I am sure she will be tear-free. Lets all hope that I will be too!